thinking.

i think too much. or maybe i don't think enough. nope, neither, i simply do not always think properly. that seems closer to the truth. according to those who know me well, i am intense. they would probably say that holds true for all aspects of my life. i'm generally all or nothing. even in my thought life i operate on a rather intense level. sometimes this is good when i think properly, but bad when improper thought reigns.

how do i know if i'm thinking properly? "Finally, brothers, whatever is true, whatever is honorable, whatever is just, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is commendable, if there is any excellence, if there is anything worthy of praise, think about these things." Philippians 4.8 well Paul just answered my question. but, what if i'm one of those people incessantly questioning? what if i want to have definitions and clarifications and such? i can easily paralasize myself (analysis paralysis). i think about something so much that i bring myself to an inward stalemate of inactivity.

we know what Paul means. think about the Gospel. think about Christ. think about the Church. Christ is true. to be abased by the Gospel is honorable. to see Christ hang upon the cross is to see justice satisfied. to see Christ's bride is lovely. for men to endure hardship, trial and suffering is commendable indeed. to behold the glory of God in the image of Christ is a vision of highest excellence. and to see the Lord enthroned on high draws us to praise Him, "Holy, Holy, Holy is the Lord God almighty!"

i think about such worthless things. my computer was going out on me and it consumed much of my thought for days. drama at one of my numerous jobs gets in my head and i let it remain. i'm such a fool to be harassed by such infinitesimal trivialities when i could be satiated with thoughts beyond language!

for many years i was convinced of my own humble and modest greatness. what a fetid waste! but lately Christ has gently shown me the great mire i had pleasurably chosen to indwell. oh what folly is the wisdom of men.

do you think what you think you think? often i do not. do you?